Lesson 45: Awareness
While there are no particular questions for this lesson, something struck me as I was reading this lesson.
The author writes: "I find that those drawn to my work with Wealth Expansion range from a little to extremely Checked Out about their finances."
If you remember from last week, I feel quite good about what I know about my numbers. I know my accounts, their balances, I check in with these things multiple times per week.
So I felt some discomfort reading this statement from the author. I recognize it's because I am still quite checked out. About what, you ask? I asked too. I'm checked out about how much I make. Even though I am currently making $1000 more a month than I was earlier this year (what?!), it all still feels like it's on a wing and a prayer!
Let me say more: I attended a school that I loved, and that school helped me peel back layers of myself that were not functioning well. It opened me and tuned me to the part of me inside that knows what direction to go, even if all the shit around me is saying that's the wrong way.
One VERY strong way this came through was in my financial world. I had a meeting with a business coach during that time where I said I was making about $300/month. He asked how I was able to live off that. I said not very well. But I knew I was moving in the direction I was supposed to be, even though my finances at that time did not reflect that. Looking back in retrospect, it was true. I was absolutely moving in the right direction.
One "fun" thing about that journey was, whenever I really needed something, it showed up. Sometimes I asked for it, and sometimes it was just there.
My current state of being feels quite similar. I am on a new journey of the soul, and a lot of things are just showing up for me to help me along the way. It is beautiful, AND it is keeping me in that old feeling.
Also, the work I do is client by client. There is no guaranteed income. While I am making over ten times what I was making during that business coach call, it feels very ungrounded. It still feels like every new chunk of money that comes in is a blessing (cool), but can't be relied upon for the future (not so cool).
There is this thing I have said to people: even if you are working for a company and make a biweekly check that you think you can rely on, there really are no guarantees. Myself, and everyone I know, has been fired or suddenly let go from something. So, there has to be another way. There are other ways. I'm not ready to get into those right now. They're probably forthcoming in my lessons.
But living paycheck to paycheck does not work. It leads to more and more feeling of ungroundedness. This is where I am in denial or checked out.
The author writes: "I find that those drawn to my work with Wealth Expansion range from a little to extremely Checked Out about their finances."
If you remember from last week, I feel quite good about what I know about my numbers. I know my accounts, their balances, I check in with these things multiple times per week.
So I felt some discomfort reading this statement from the author. I recognize it's because I am still quite checked out. About what, you ask? I asked too. I'm checked out about how much I make. Even though I am currently making $1000 more a month than I was earlier this year (what?!), it all still feels like it's on a wing and a prayer!
Let me say more: I attended a school that I loved, and that school helped me peel back layers of myself that were not functioning well. It opened me and tuned me to the part of me inside that knows what direction to go, even if all the shit around me is saying that's the wrong way.
One VERY strong way this came through was in my financial world. I had a meeting with a business coach during that time where I said I was making about $300/month. He asked how I was able to live off that. I said not very well. But I knew I was moving in the direction I was supposed to be, even though my finances at that time did not reflect that. Looking back in retrospect, it was true. I was absolutely moving in the right direction.
One "fun" thing about that journey was, whenever I really needed something, it showed up. Sometimes I asked for it, and sometimes it was just there.
My current state of being feels quite similar. I am on a new journey of the soul, and a lot of things are just showing up for me to help me along the way. It is beautiful, AND it is keeping me in that old feeling.
Also, the work I do is client by client. There is no guaranteed income. While I am making over ten times what I was making during that business coach call, it feels very ungrounded. It still feels like every new chunk of money that comes in is a blessing (cool), but can't be relied upon for the future (not so cool).
There is this thing I have said to people: even if you are working for a company and make a biweekly check that you think you can rely on, there really are no guarantees. Myself, and everyone I know, has been fired or suddenly let go from something. So, there has to be another way. There are other ways. I'm not ready to get into those right now. They're probably forthcoming in my lessons.
But living paycheck to paycheck does not work. It leads to more and more feeling of ungroundedness. This is where I am in denial or checked out.
Comments
Post a Comment